This picture was taken in 1983 - Alicia was 3 and Blake was 12. Charlotte was 30 and Grandma Lusk was 70. 
Blake at age 2. 
Blake at age 21
Blake in 2nd or 3rd grade. Tuesday, January 17, 2012
Friday, December 09, 2011
Christmas 2011
During the holidays, we blog as an extended family on our other blog: http://family-christmas.blogspot.com/
I have posted a few posts this week. Sometimes, you have to guess which family member has posted. We'll work on that so it isn't so confusing. You can usually tell which one are mine because we mention Alaska or our names or something.
Happy Christmas to you all. Love, Charlotte
I have posted a few posts this week. Sometimes, you have to guess which family member has posted. We'll work on that so it isn't so confusing. You can usually tell which one are mine because we mention Alaska or our names or something.
Happy Christmas to you all. Love, Charlotte
Monday, October 24, 2011
Daddy's Obit
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Monday, September 12, 2011
Chester Arthur Lusk
Well, another sad milestone to record. My dear Grandfather, C. Art Lusk, passed away on August 18, 2011 in Oregon City, Oregon. He had alzhiemers for many years as well as numerous health issues, but he outlived Grandma by 9 months. He was the kindest, gentlest, sweetest man I've ever known and I loved him so much, my whole life.
I am so glad that he and my dear grandmother are together in heaven and I am so blessed to have the knowledge in my heart that he is restored and he remembers her and is with her and all his family.
It is hard to lose all three of my anchors in such a short period of time, but I am surviving. Ten or twenty years ago, I would not have survived losing even one of them, so my sadness is somewhat overcome by the victory of my growth. Brian and Alicia have been so good to help me through all this, and of course their grief at losing these wonderful people is just as great as mine is.
I am so glad that he and my dear grandmother are together in heaven and I am so blessed to have the knowledge in my heart that he is restored and he remembers her and is with her and all his family.
It is hard to lose all three of my anchors in such a short period of time, but I am surviving. Ten or twenty years ago, I would not have survived losing even one of them, so my sadness is somewhat overcome by the victory of my growth. Brian and Alicia have been so good to help me through all this, and of course their grief at losing these wonderful people is just as great as mine is.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
Recovery, step 694,305,300,402
Unfortuately, the friend I was hoping had the answers didn't have the answers for me. It kind of sounded like parts of my letter (like the parts from the beginning, through the middle, and towards the end) caught him a little by surprise. Like I was saying, the crazy part about facebook reunions, is that one person usually isn't aware of the affect they had on another person's life. One person can have larger than life memories about the other person and person number 2 barely remembers person number 1. So I guess the secrets I was looking for will remain secret or missing. I'm trying to decide that they weren't necessary to the journey I'm on anymore.
Brian's grant for his job was cut so he's looking for another job - probably doing the same thing but with a different age group or at a different school or agency. Welding looks like it will be more profitable this summer which is a big help. If we have a good welding summer, we don't need the work in the school year....but the economy has put such a damper on the welding business, it hasn't paid too well for a couple years. We need another Greek millionaire who doesn't know what he's doing to come along and employ us for the summer. That summer was golden.
Actually, if we could sell our house, we are ready to go to Ecuador. Tired of 10 months of winter, cold all the time... no plants or trees that will grow in the garden. I guess just ready to move on..
Brian's camera finally got here from Africa, so I'll post his africa pictures when I feel better. He is having all his animals mounted or made into rugs, but they won't be here for at least another year. Already dreaming and planning for his next trip and which animals he will look for then.
OH, the recovery progress: the exercise bike, in just 2 rides hurt my knees so bad that I sold it right away. It wasn't the right piece of equipment for this stage in my body's recovery. I HAVE lost a total of 27 pounds - still hundreds to go, but a very good start. I have a goal of what I want to weigh before we move to Ecuador, so I still have lots of motivation to keep going. The therapy program I'm using has you look at your past to find the roots of the problem, which I tried to do, and then you have to move on from there. I think that being mentally crazy and physically disabled combined makes a journey difficult... and I have usually given up before. I don't want to give up this time. Because my mind doesn't always see things the way they were, I often turn to other people to ask their take on what happened, or what is happening. I always assume , or at least hope, that they have an honest or clear impression of what really happened.. and no hidden agenda of their own that will taint their view of an event. But of course, that is unrealistic. We all see the parts of life that our eyes can see. None of us EVER sees an event clearly and without our own agenda. It's impossible. Yet, that is what I am always looking for - the impossible, the perfect, the one that won't disappoint.
It's too intense. I drive people away from me with my intensity and my drama and my desire for all of life to be perfect. I don't know if all the therapy in the world can fix that.
Brian's grant for his job was cut so he's looking for another job - probably doing the same thing but with a different age group or at a different school or agency. Welding looks like it will be more profitable this summer which is a big help. If we have a good welding summer, we don't need the work in the school year....but the economy has put such a damper on the welding business, it hasn't paid too well for a couple years. We need another Greek millionaire who doesn't know what he's doing to come along and employ us for the summer. That summer was golden.
Actually, if we could sell our house, we are ready to go to Ecuador. Tired of 10 months of winter, cold all the time... no plants or trees that will grow in the garden. I guess just ready to move on..
Brian's camera finally got here from Africa, so I'll post his africa pictures when I feel better. He is having all his animals mounted or made into rugs, but they won't be here for at least another year. Already dreaming and planning for his next trip and which animals he will look for then.
OH, the recovery progress: the exercise bike, in just 2 rides hurt my knees so bad that I sold it right away. It wasn't the right piece of equipment for this stage in my body's recovery. I HAVE lost a total of 27 pounds - still hundreds to go, but a very good start. I have a goal of what I want to weigh before we move to Ecuador, so I still have lots of motivation to keep going. The therapy program I'm using has you look at your past to find the roots of the problem, which I tried to do, and then you have to move on from there. I think that being mentally crazy and physically disabled combined makes a journey difficult... and I have usually given up before. I don't want to give up this time. Because my mind doesn't always see things the way they were, I often turn to other people to ask their take on what happened, or what is happening. I always assume , or at least hope, that they have an honest or clear impression of what really happened.. and no hidden agenda of their own that will taint their view of an event. But of course, that is unrealistic. We all see the parts of life that our eyes can see. None of us EVER sees an event clearly and without our own agenda. It's impossible. Yet, that is what I am always looking for - the impossible, the perfect, the one that won't disappoint.
It's too intense. I drive people away from me with my intensity and my drama and my desire for all of life to be perfect. I don't know if all the therapy in the world can fix that.
Saturday, April 23, 2011
day one of exercise
3 minutes on the bike today. figured I would only last one minute, so big victory. my blood sugar dropped immediately. cool
Thursday, April 21, 2011
steps
One of the therapy programs the doctor has me on is that every day I have to either go outside or go up or down the stairs. This time of year, I usually choose outside because we are waiting for spring to come and for the shore birds to return to our pond and baby moose to be born - stuff like that. Last week we went out and saw that the rhubarb is coming up in the garden and that the raspberry plants look like they survived the winter.
Upstairs in my house is 1000 square feet of studio - half craft room mostly for scrapbooking and the other half a giant sewing room. Craft and sewing space I have dreamed of my entire adult life. There are 10 steps and a landing between me and that craft utopia. The stairs are beautiful spruce wood - sanded and lacquared, very beautiful. There is even a landing halfway up for resting.
The first few steps, I do great. sometimes, I don't even use my cane, I just bound up them like a mountain sheep. but then I get to the landing and for some reason, I can't get up on it. I switch legs and switch sides of my cane, I try to find things to grab. I always get stalled stepping onto the landing. The dogs find this annoying because the landing is where they spend their afternoons - watching for the UPS guy and Brian to come home from work. They just look at me, like move it or lose it lady - we want the landing back.
The other night I was studying the steps from my chair in the living room - there is a post between my view and some of the steps and I kept trying to measure them in my mind, picturing me bounding up and down them with ease. And I noticed that a step was missing near the landing. I thought the post was blocking my view so I moved from side to side, trying to get a view of that step. Finally, I figured out, there isn't one. Alicia looked over with me and she grabbed a measuring tape and this is what we found: step one is 5 3/4 inches. very manageable for someone with little tiny short legs like mine. next four steps were 7 1/2 inches. about the maximum that I can comfortably manage. last step to the landing is a tiny bit over 10 inches. TEN INCHES !! No wonder I struggle on that step every time. The newell posts are cobbled onto the stair case, so they are no help to use as leverage. We said bad words about the man that built our house. If he had pulled the steps out a couple inches, there would have been room for that last step and all the risers would have been closer to 6 1/2 or 7 inches.
Turn the landing to finish the climb - next step is 5 1/2 inches.
I do this funny thing in my mind when I think I can't tackle something because of my physical condition. I bemoan the fact that I have lost this or that ability... like one day Brian came home and found me crying because i wasn't strong enough to turn the water on or off in the bathroom. I was so sad that I had lost that ability. Turned out the faucet had broken - he couldn't turn it either. I was getting so weak getting out of my recliner that I had to get a lift chair and let Brian have the recliner. Turned out, the recliner is a bugger to close - he and Alicia have to really kick it to get it to close. I wasn't getting weaker, the chair was wearing out. stuff like that. you know. I panic, I worry, I feel sorry for myself. so we have had a bit of a laugh (after a while, you have to laugh) about the stairs now. It wasn't me at all - it was an idiotic build. Haven't figured out what to do about it yet, but at least now we know it wasn't psychological or physical. I just have short legs and the step is very tall.
Upstairs in my house is 1000 square feet of studio - half craft room mostly for scrapbooking and the other half a giant sewing room. Craft and sewing space I have dreamed of my entire adult life. There are 10 steps and a landing between me and that craft utopia. The stairs are beautiful spruce wood - sanded and lacquared, very beautiful. There is even a landing halfway up for resting.
The first few steps, I do great. sometimes, I don't even use my cane, I just bound up them like a mountain sheep. but then I get to the landing and for some reason, I can't get up on it. I switch legs and switch sides of my cane, I try to find things to grab. I always get stalled stepping onto the landing. The dogs find this annoying because the landing is where they spend their afternoons - watching for the UPS guy and Brian to come home from work. They just look at me, like move it or lose it lady - we want the landing back.
The other night I was studying the steps from my chair in the living room - there is a post between my view and some of the steps and I kept trying to measure them in my mind, picturing me bounding up and down them with ease. And I noticed that a step was missing near the landing. I thought the post was blocking my view so I moved from side to side, trying to get a view of that step. Finally, I figured out, there isn't one. Alicia looked over with me and she grabbed a measuring tape and this is what we found: step one is 5 3/4 inches. very manageable for someone with little tiny short legs like mine. next four steps were 7 1/2 inches. about the maximum that I can comfortably manage. last step to the landing is a tiny bit over 10 inches. TEN INCHES !! No wonder I struggle on that step every time. The newell posts are cobbled onto the stair case, so they are no help to use as leverage. We said bad words about the man that built our house. If he had pulled the steps out a couple inches, there would have been room for that last step and all the risers would have been closer to 6 1/2 or 7 inches.
Turn the landing to finish the climb - next step is 5 1/2 inches.
I do this funny thing in my mind when I think I can't tackle something because of my physical condition. I bemoan the fact that I have lost this or that ability... like one day Brian came home and found me crying because i wasn't strong enough to turn the water on or off in the bathroom. I was so sad that I had lost that ability. Turned out the faucet had broken - he couldn't turn it either. I was getting so weak getting out of my recliner that I had to get a lift chair and let Brian have the recliner. Turned out, the recliner is a bugger to close - he and Alicia have to really kick it to get it to close. I wasn't getting weaker, the chair was wearing out. stuff like that. you know. I panic, I worry, I feel sorry for myself. so we have had a bit of a laugh (after a while, you have to laugh) about the stairs now. It wasn't me at all - it was an idiotic build. Haven't figured out what to do about it yet, but at least now we know it wasn't psychological or physical. I just have short legs and the step is very tall.
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