Cancer Stinks

I know there are some of you that would have liked for me to call and talk to you about my big cancer scare and I know that the laws of family and society would have been better served if I had said something but I hope you will forgive me that I haven't.



There are some people I just can't talk to about this because if I do, it will make the scare and the cancer so REAL that I won't be able to function. I love you all so much and you are all so far away and if I don't talk to you about this, then maybe it is all a mistake or it is someone else's life or something. I just can't face yet having cancer interface in every area of my life.



I had a couple friends call to talk about it after they heard it at church and after the first couple calls, I was like, OKAY , I don't want to talk about cancer anymore. This isn't fun.



I don't mean to leave you out and I don't mean to deny you the blessings you would get by helping me - I just need to be an ostrich for a few more weeks. Every day that I have to get my blood drawn or some stupid scans or pictures taken or something - the beast raises its ugly head in my face and says - HEY CHARLOTTE _ YOU ARE SICKER THAN YOU USED TO BE. and I deal with it for a few minutes or a day and freak out and then I'm able to put it out of the front of my face for a while.



I love you guys and know that you love me. Thanks for the prayers and any of you that can, please put Alicia and Brian and I on the temple prayer rolls. Thanks. Love, Charlotte